Sometimes I just feel a little stuck.
Do you ever look around you and realize that nothing in this time or place feels the way it’s supposed to? Do you ever feel stuck, immobile when all you want to do is loosen the reigns and run? Like you’re made for so much more than the life you’re living, but you don’t even know where to begin to change it?
If you would have asked me three months ago what my summer would look like, I would have said that I had no clue. With internship opportunities falling through left and right, I was frustrated to a point I’d never been before. I was feeling anxious and I doubted that anything worthwhile was going to come through in time for summer.
Then, all at once, internship things started to line up, and I’ve found myself working for an arts and education center in New Castle. My internship perfectly aligns with the things I like to do; I am planning and promoting an arts festival, writing blog posts, managing social media and other nerdy PR tasks that no one really wants to hear about. I have a bright little office with a window that overlooks a pretty view of the courtyard. Everything worked out just fine in the end.
Yet, some days I just can’t shake that feeling of restlessness. Without realizing it, my mind falls into the “grass is always greener” mentality until I am staring out that little window wishing I were looking out on a beautiful city skyline or a Mediterranean coast. On the drive to and from work every day I find myself lost in daydreams about what this summer could have looked like, if only it had worked out the way I planned it.
Maybe you can relate to this feeling, too. Maybe you sit at your desk staring out at a big city skyline wishing you, too, were somewhere else. Maybe home for you isn’t a respite from a busy workday, but a reminder of more responsibilities and the baggage that is weighing you down. Maybe you feel a little stuck too, and it takes everything in you to get through the day, just to keep up with the world that is spinning madly on around you.
As these thoughts rush in and out of my consciousness, my soul becomes burdened by the weight of my own discontent and ingratitude. As the lies of that hypothetical “something better” strangle me, I hear a voice whisper you are here.
You are here. And it may not be the “here” you wished it were. Maybe it’s not the “here” you thought you would end up at, or maybe your “here” isn’t a place at all, but a circumstance, a situation. The truth is, you are always going to be “here,” whether that’s exactly the place you wanted it to be, or somewhere that feels miles and miles off track.
But no matter where you are, there is not a single place that is out of God’s reach. There is not a single place that He is not using you, sometimes when you don’t even realize it.
What we often forget, when we are “stuck” and dissatisfied with our circumstances, is that there is always work to be done. Even when we feel too small, too insignificant, unable to make a real difference, God chooses us for unique purposes and places us exactly where we need to be to fulfill them.
We can’t let discontent be our excuse for doing nothing; instead, we can use our unrest to empower greater things, and it starts with relinquishing our supposed “control” over our lives and succumbing to God’s purposes here and now, instead of waiting for that nondescript point in the future when we think we will somehow be better suited to serve Him.
Even in your unique “here,” God is moving. And while He is, you need only to be still– to be here, and allow Him to use you however and wherever He will.
I’ll end with this quote that I heard from a sermon recently to prove that nothing we do is insignificant when it is done in faith:
Never underestimate the power of a small contribution in the hands of a mighty God. –Phil Bartholomew